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Mending a Broken Relationship: It’s Possible

Kaaren Moore blog post mending broken relationship It's possible

I am a God who heals. I heal broken bodies, broken minds, broken hearts, broken lives, and broken relationships. My very Presence has immense healing powers.        Jesus Calling, August 20


“With men it is impossible, but not with God; for with God all things are possible.”    Mark 10:27, NKJV

When Jesus said that all things are possible with God, did He include fixing those broken, somewhat cracked, even estranged relationships we sometimes experience?

When we suffer the sadness of a broken relationship, we may grieve it for years. We may even wonder if it is really possible to mend it, or if we should just cut our losses and move on.

With God, all things are still possible!

One reason we can say with confidence that all things are possible with God is that God has not changed. He has not moved away. In fact, He knows the pain and frustration of broken relationships because His own children walked off without Him. Despite being treated as though He doesn’t exist, He opens the door and lets us back in. To this day, He renews relationships with anyone who wants to be near Him.

Of course, mending a bruised relationship takes two people who really want healing to happen. God doesn’t give up on us because He exists as unconditional love. He wants us to be part of His family. Even if He’s the only one making the effort, He keeps trying.

Do We Really Want to Mend Things?

In our case, we may not be quite that willing, to pursue those who have offended us, caused us pain, or simply made us miserable. We might feel better about simply letting go of the situation and not looking back.

The question of whether you can mend a fractured relationship has one answer: yes, with God’s help, it’s possible! If you really want things to change, He’ll start with you, softening your heart so you can step aside from emotional issues and focus on His direction.  He will either help you fix things or allow you to move on with a peaceful spirit. In either case, you’ve opened the door to a new possibility, one that won’t leave you feeling stuck or angry, but instead, feeling God’s grace and peace.

It Takes Two to Mend a Relationship

In Robert Frost’s poem called Mending Wall, he describes the way he and a neighbor repair the wall that has broken down during the winter. Each spring, he and his neighbor, each staying on their respective sides of the fence, walk the length of the wall, chatting, looking for the holes in the fence, and one by one picking up stones to fill in the gaps. They each mend their own side, but they agree that it takes the two of them to get the job done. They complete the work and respond that “good fences make good neighbors.”

For any relationship to mend, both sides have to own their part of the brokenness and seek ways to mend the gaps in their thinking, their styles, and their perspective. Each one has to bring something to the rebuilding, with a desire to fix things before they are broken down even further.

Forgiveness Is a Key to Possibility

Mending a relationship may require you to surrender the hurt and frustration and the need to be right. It means prayerfully asking God for a soft and forgiving heart. It means a willingness to forgive the offender seventy times seven and then some. It may also mean setting boundaries so you can move on, knowing you’ve done all you can.

Some relationships are created for a given time but are not necessarily meant to be sustained for a lifetime. Others drive us to seek God’s grace and mercy to heal and to shine a light on renewed possibility. Either way, God will revive your spirit and heal your pain. You will be free to breathe in His direction for your life once more.

What Can You Do to Help Mend a Relationship Today?

Spend time in prayer

Own your part of the issues in the relationship

Be willing to listen to the other person with an open mind and heart

Reach out in love, even if you’re rejected

Remind yourself that it may be okay for the relationship to end

Be honest about whether you really want to mend the relationship

Listen for God’s help and direction

Define What It Means to Mend the Relationship

Repairing, mending, reviving, renewing any relationship is hard work. It takes the efforts of two people intimately involved, and equally desiring that the relationship continues. Often, it means that God must help because people are not always equipped to do the work needed. In any case, possibilities can be created when love abounds and when forgiveness prevails. Give each of your relationships to God, for He alone can make all things possible within them.


Karen Moore blogger for Jesus Calling Mending a broken relationship it's possibleKaren Moore, married, mother of six and grandmother to ten, is the author of more than 100 books in the inspirational and devotional book categories. Some of her best-selling devotionals include:  Prayers from the Heart, What a Great Word, Strength for Your Soul, Every Day Is Mother’s Day and The Heart-Shaped Life Daily Devotional.  HIt's Still Possible book by Karen Mooreer latest devotional is called It’s Still Possible.
Karen is also a writing conference and women’s conference speaker, an author coach, a content provider for Stationery and Gift markets and writes a blog, called Turning Up the Light at www.karenmooreauthor.com. She recently launched a new campaign called Got 10 Minutes for God?
Karen hopes to inspire others to take time to chat with God each morning

 

8 thoughts on “Mending a Broken Relationship: It’s Possible

  1. Thank you for this blog on mending relationships. I have 2 out of the 4 grown children who I have no relationships with, and I needed this insight and knowledge to help me.

    1. Vicki….God knows your heart and hears your prayers. Your situation is not too big or too hard for Him. Continue to seek His guidance and He will show you the way.. I will be praying for you for God’s blessings and possibilities.

  2. Thank you for the points presented and of course, bringing all matters before God. Open and transparent conversations about the hurt and pain is critical as each party acknowledges the matter. Forgiveness requires some discussion of the issues. I am currently working my way through a painful situation that I desire to be mended. Pray for me and the other person.

  3. Dear Florence,
    Sometimes when I agonize over the pain and sadness of a broken relationship, I have to step back and remind myself that our amazing God offers His children endless possibilities to seek His forgiveness. The gift to us is that He forgives us every time. I am humbled by that thought. You can trust Him to guide your heart and mind in your current situation. May He bless you and your dear one mightily. You are in my prayers.

  4. “It means a willingness to forgive the offender seventy times seven and then some. It may also mean setting boundaries so you can move on, knowing you’ve done all you can.”

    This is a pain point for me. How do you know when it’s another time to forgive vs a time that a boundary has been crossed and it’s time to move on? I know every one says prayer and Discernment but this is still hard for me.

    1. Victoria,
      There are no pat answers for the dilemma and the pain you feel. I believe that God wants us to always check our own motives and our own willingness to be forgiving. I believe that He will also affirm the appropriate time to move on . Just keep listening.

  5. “Some relationships are created for a given time but are not necessarily meant to be sustained for a lifetime.”

    You blew it. A marriage is necessarily “meant” to be sustained for a lifetime.

  6. David, You are so right to point out that marriage relationships carry a different set of standards in the sight of God. This article is speaking to other kinds of relationships like those within business, friendship, and family.

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